The Morning After

Well, it is the morning after. If you know me at all you can probably guess that I am happy with the results of last night's election. Aside from the presidential race, I saw several women elected to congress including the first open lesbian. I saw equality spread to more citizens, it is a slow journey, but it is moving. On a local level I saw schools get much needed money for improvements. And believe it or not, while I fear more stonewalling, I am kind of glad that the House remained Republican and the Senate Democratic. I think when they are different we have more opportunity to find solutions that will help a broader spectrum of Americans.

Unfortunately happiness is not what has driven me to blog on this sunny Colorado morning. I woke up to check out my Facebook feed and I am enraged!

There are people I have kept on as friends for years despite a difference of opinion. Throughout the election, I even followed what they had to say on the chance they might be able to influence me. But with all the doomsday and disaster talk, veiled racism, desperate sorrow for our country and downright anger I am seeing today, I think it is time to start unfriending. The election is done. Now is the time to come together. Those of you who want to move to Canada, go for it. The comments of "I won't support Obama even if he is the President" and "I don't care what happens as long as he fails," are exactly what is ruining this country.

I fear what these people are teaching their children. As an adult I am not sure what I thought of President Reagan or President Bush, but through a child's eyes, they were heroes. The President had the most powerful position in the world and there was nothing cooler. Now we are teaching our kids that they need a permission slip every time the President speaks and it will be on TV at school. We are getting mad at teachers because they ask students to sing a song for the president. Sorry parents, it is not religion. It is the government of our country and we all share it. The more our kids know the better. The more respect they have for those in power, the better. Please don't tell your kids it is the end of the world because the other guy won. Remember, respect does not mean following blindly. Teach them to think on why they agree or disagree, but be respectful.

Instead of bitching and moaning on facebook, write to your congressman when there is legislation you care about. Go do something. I have been inspired by a friend who intends to call our local house representative every week. Will it make a difference? Who knows. But it is a step towards being involved more than once every four years. I suppose if you only pay attention every four years it does make this blow more crushing.

If the election had gone the other way, I had my post ready. I thought long and hard about it. I was going to write, "While that didn't go as I had hoped, I hope that President Romney can lead America in the right direction, and try to bring cooperation between all members of congress." and this morning I can make one edit and say the same thing for President Obama. "I hope that President Obama can lead America in the right direction, and try to bring cooperation between all members of congress.”

The unfriending of me may now commence!

Cyberbullying: Not Just for Teens Anymore!

If you read any amount of news you have probably heard about cyberbullying. It is the form of bullying through social networks, cell phones and text messages that drives teens to depression and, in the drastic cases that make the news, suicide.

As a mother of two grade school children I hear a lot about bullying. It is a very hot topic these days. Heck, one of my daughters has bullying prevention as her top goal now that she is on student council. This is a good thing. I think it is wonderful that we as a society have decided to start treating other human beings better at a young age. Teaching our children compassion and how to peacefully resolve differences is invaluable in the global information age they will be living in the rest of their lives.

There is a problem that still exists though. It is a problem that is getting no attention. If you do a quick google search for cyberbullying, the first several links all give a definition of cyberbullying as relating to adolescents and children. But one quick look at my Facebook news feed and it is apparent that the problem goes much deeper or, to be more accurate, older.

Clearly my generation missed the memo. Even though we are not on the playground, there are still plenty of bullies out there. You may not notice, but many of them are on my friends list and I bet if you look closer they are on yours too.

I noticed this trend because in the past week I have been a victim of this passive aggressive form of bullying. Thanks to my Facebook “friends” I now know that I should feel bad about my new iPhone, my job status, my love of football, my social life, my political preferences and the way I am raising my kids. I have been informed that I am a bad person for posting about these things when I should be more concerned with mass shootings, the political climate and kids starving in Africa (though I think we should probably worry more about kids starving in America.)

While I rationally know that what other people think of me does not matter, it would be a lie to say that it doesn't sting a little to be accused of not caring about anything but my iPhone. Looking at my facebook statuses though, that is what I put out there. I don't want to burden every acquaintance on facebook about the terrors and misery in the world. People know those things, they watch or read the news. It is not insensitive of me to be excited about watching football when others are struggling. I assume if people are my facebook friends it is because they want to know a little bit about what makes me happy, keeps me ticking or makes me laugh.

This putting down of others seems to be very common. I think the reason is most people see Facebook as a place to share every little thought that goes through their minds. I can accept that we see things differently, but if you are a constant bullying energy, I am hiding your posts or unfriending you.

So when do things go from sharing your feelings to bullying? It is very simple. Let me give you an example. I had one friend a few weeks ago that thought the first Sunday of football was frivolous when the country is facing a tumultuous political time.

This could be shared in a personal way: “I just can't get excited about football because I find the political challenges our country is facing too distracting.”

See how that is just about you? I like to read that because I learn a little about your thoughts and feelings and even though they are different than mine, I am happy to read it.

Or you can share in a bullying way: “I think it is disgusting that people want to watch football when there are bigger issues to worry about.”

With that second post you just attacked every one of your Facebook friends that does like football. Whether you meant to or not, you just made a flicker of guilt cross their minds. You placed yourself as being better than them and even if it was fleeting, they felt worse than you. That is bullying. Making yourself feel better by making others feel worse.

We get very caught up in free speech, but it is very easy to hurt others along the way. I put a lot of effort into sending positive energy out on my Facebook page. I think it is far better to post a shallow, “I love my iPhone!” status than to post, “I hate people who...” I encourage you to start thinking before you post. Are you saying something in a way that is meant to hurt people with different opinions? Then fix before you hit send. It is awfully hard to teach our children kindness, empathy and friendship when we as adults are spending our social media time insulting each other!

I'm back!

So I started this blog, and posted fairly regularly for about 2 months. Then I wandered away and never looked back. Lately however, I have had an increasing number of situations that make me want to scream on my Facebook wall and I remind myself that that is not the place for my rants. This is the place!

When I started this almost 2 years ago, I intended to keep my topics of a political nature. Since then I have grown in the number of things I want to talk about. Sometimes I will be voicing specific opinions other times I might be trying to sort out my opinions from a big sea of confusion.

One of my hopes for this blog is that I get people talking, or at least thinking. If you say to even one person, "I read my friend's blog and she had this ridiculous opinion!" then I am happy because a conversation will start, and I think we, as Americans, are starting to lose the skill of educated conversation. Too quickly we jump to "If I am right, then someone must be wrong." But who is to say there is not a middle ground? You will never find this middle ground if you never converse! Let's get talking!

Continue thinking for yourself,
Jen

From a year ago

Before I started this blog, I shared my thoughts in facebook notes. Here is one from a year ago almost to the day. It is with a heavy heart that I feel it become relevant as the media swirls around the tragic events in Tucson. I do not know anything about what influenced this shooter, but I do know you can only shout at the masses to "take action" or "reload" so many times before someone does.

January 12, 2009
But I need to vent. Not for the first time, I have seen clips in which reporters and commentators on American news say what this country needs is for a big, high casualty terrorist attack to show the nation how dangerous, incompetent (etc.) President Obama is.

Yes we have free speech. You CAN say such things without being drawn and quartered. But what I want to know is, how will these people feel if someone mentally unstable tunes in, hears these comments, and decides it is up to them to carry out such a plan? Is another Oklahoma City really worth discrediting Obama?

I don't care what your political views of elected officials are, but NONE of them are worth wishing death upon hundreds or thousands of innocent Americans. How dare you. Wishing death on innocent people to prove your agenda is barely different to me than the people overseas who order their followers to come over and harm people. Goodness knows, George W. Bush was not my favorite President, but NEVER would I wish for this country to go through such a thing as 9/11 again to "prove" my points.

You get paid a lot of money to speak on television. Next time think first. You have to have some social responsibility. Unfortunately there are people who listen to these statements. Let's hope that if they are so unstable they take it seriously, then they are too unstable to plan any action.

Stop the presses! Dubya's feelings are hurt!

There are so many things I could write following election day, but I gravitate towards political entertainment so here is my topic: George W. Bush says in his new book and an interview with Matt Lauer that THE worst moment of his presidency was when Kanye said, "George Bush doesn't care about black people." I have several thoughts on this issue and am going to lay them out here! Enjoy! Laugh, cry, and hit the comments!

First, let me address things that I think (in no particular order) were worse than Kanye calling it as he sees it.
1. 9/11/01 
2. The whole Iraq war. Especially the invisible WMDs.
3. Hurricane Katrina and the aftermath
4. Housing bubble bursting
5. The Mission Accomplished Thing
6. The rapid downfall of the Dixie Chicks' album Home, which is brilliant and never got the credit it deserved.  (ok this ones a joke, but if Dubya can be stupid, so can I)

But no, our former leader thinks the worst part was when an annoying popstar called him a name. If only he weren't out of office, he could have said his worst moment was when Kanye stole the mic from Taylor Swift at the VMA's. Talk about national trauma!

To be fair, Kanye was incorrect. We have no evidence that Dubya hates black people. What we do have indicators of is that he hates poor people. Aside from the Katrina debacle, we have evidence like this: http://nyti.ms/5lwrQ

Also, I think he may have selected this moment because the personal nature of it represented the culmination of all his failures. I am inclined to think this theory gives him too much credit, since neither the book or interview indicate this scenario, but it is a possibility.

Continue thinking for yourself.

62 Percent is Pathetic

I read this article this morning: http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20100825/ap_on_re_us/us_nyc_mosque I liked what Bloomberg has to say. The part that got me all fired up was about 2/3 of the way through. There they were talking about a recent poll and I read this:

"The poll of 1,003 randomly chosen adults was conducted by the nonpartisan Pew Research Center and showed that a majority, 62 percent, also said Muslims have equal rights to build houses of worship."

Where do I start? Perhaps with the fact that the writer seems excited about this number?

No, let's go with the obvious. 62 percent? 62 percent? Now I have been out of school a while now, but I am pretty sure that means 38% think that Muslims DO NOT have equal rights. That so many people want to make an entire religion pay for the acts of a few just makes me so mad!

Throughout this battle I keep thinking back to one of my favorite things I saw on the West Wing EVER. It was the first episode back after September 11^th. Aaron Sorkin wrote an episode about terrorism that broke from the longer story lines of the show. In the episode, Josh is stuck in a room with high school students that had been on a tour when the White House went in to lockdown. A frank discussion of the nature of terrorism ensues. At one point Bradley Whitford delivers the following line, “You're juniors and seniors. In honor of the SATs you're about to take, answer the following question: [writing on dry eraseboard] Islamic extremist is to Islam as "blank" is to Christianity.” His answer? The KKK. Every religion has extremist groups. They always have. They always will. Few topics can force humans to extremes, but religion has shown to be one of those topics, century after century.

We are supposed to be a land of freedom. Dr. Laura may have lost her radio show, but she isn't in prison for the rest of her life. We can say what we want. We can own guns. We can practice any religion we want. That is what makes us unique as a nation. If we are to embrace that, we need to embrace those who live here, no matter their race, religion or sexuality.

There are many other points in this article that bear discussion, but I am doing my best to stay close to the topic I started on. I already have ideas for at least three more blogs now!

Continue thinking for yourself.

Don't Know Much About Politics

So I have opinions. I want to share them. I like to share them. However I do not like splashing them all over Facebook and annoying friends with them. So I have started this blog so I can still put my thoughts into the universe. If people want to read them they will, if they don't- I won't be killing anyone's Farmville buzz.

As the title suggests, I am not an expert. I am writing my opinions as I see them from my little corner of the world. I will do my best to see both sides of an issue, but we all know how hard that can be! 

Usually my feelings (rants) come from articles I have recently read or news clips I have just seen. I will link you to those as often as possible so you can form your own opinions too! I love discussion, so hit up the comments if you want to cheer along with my rant, or even if you want to respectfully disagree! But wherever your opinion falls, I want you to be respectful. This blog's goal is not to pick fights, it is to express my personal opinions.

If you don't like what I write and don't feel comfortable commenting, you do have one other option. It is quite revolutionary, and many people don't know about it. This handy tip is good for anything on the internet you don't want to see. Take your mouse (or position your finger on the track pad) and move the cursor to the upper right corner. There is a little “X” there. Click on it and I will never bother you again.